Do you have rapport with other people? How do you know? In The Brain and Emotional Intelligence, Dr. Daniel Goleman writes about the emotional, social and even physiological ingredients for genuine rapport What are those ingredients of rapport? This is what he says:
There are three ingredients to rapport. The first is paying full attention. Both people need to tune in fully to the other, putting aside distractions. The second is being in synch non-verbally. If two people are really connecting well, and you were to observe that interaction without paying attention to what they were saying (like watching a film with no soundtrack), you’ll see their moves are almost choreographed, like a dance. Such synchrony is orchestrated by another set of neurons, called oscillators, which regulate how our body moves in relationship to another body (or any object). The third ingredient of rapport is positive feeling. It’s a kind of micro-flow, an interpersonal high – I would expect you’d see left prefrontal arousal for both people. These moments of interpersonal chemistry, or simpatico, are when things happen at their best – no matter the specifics of what we’re doing together.
– The Brain and Emotional Intelligence; Kindle location 685